During the day I am acting very out of character. When I am returning home I question that I have not been able to see myself. I question why I am the way I am. My wife returns from home and sits with me and we talk. I let her know that my day was terrible and I discuss some of the views I've had and include myself that I was not including myself during the day. This was the reason for the day and why I feel so miserable as though I'm no longer in reality or awareness of myself.
Prior to today I encountered many people and wanted to know who is Jesus. A coworker believes many things in the world and believes that I have something of the spirit but in bits and pieces. One the Wednesday prior to today, he and I chat online and he is pumped up with confidence to explain Jesus and the Bible. His entire focus is as any other conversation. To me his conversations appear to be taking reality and viewing it with a doom and gloom, a bad side, a living hell. He states there is a devil and a hell. After realizing my understanding on January 13, 2007 I became aware of no existence of hell. All my woes have disappeared. I feel born again and like a child as the world appears different yet I know the change was me. I saw myself. Self awareness removed all hatred, hell and burden from me. I felt as though I had stepped into a new place and all this in daylight while all in the world was happening. The change was beautiful for the world had in one instance become beautiful. All that from the view of myself as a part of myself yet separate from my body, dwelling in my body. This changed Everything with no stone unturned, yet I knew nothing about what I saw except it was beautiful and no evil existed.
With my lack of awareness of hell and evil, I am preaching it and crying in such happiness and joy. I am feeling so tranquil and blissful. I realize new things in life and energy. Then I meet people who speak of hell and all I can do is deny it exists, yet I am aware that it did exist inside me prior to my change. This awareness of no hell placed my awareness that hell did exist, but the word Hell and the meaning of it in the skin for humans is misunderstood as a place of doom and gloom for eternity. Hell to the mind of a human was just as surface as a thought that someone is doing things bad, for hell and bad go hand in hand. The results of living in hell is to see doom and gloom in this glorious and beautiful world we are standing in. The removal of self from hell is to become aware of this beautiful and glorious world. The transformation made me feel born again. The born again did not bring my awareness of Jesus Christ though. I realized that there is understanding which makes us who we are. My realization that the One exists and is aware of all is clearer in my mind. Thusly, the awareness of hell and tribulation is occurring at this moment. It is happening just as Heaven is here. Heaven and Hell exist, but the places of hell are within the mind. It is where we must escape from.
Going back to my friend I speak of at work, and recalling a conversation I had with courier making deliveries, and recalling some guy who is on Youtube speaking about Jesus showing up in his dreams and he began to preach a lot that Jesus is the way and to fight the devil, sin and hell itself. Everything is doom and gloom and thus you have something to fight and Jesus is the savior and the way to heaven and to God. During these conversations I tried to point out that there is no hell and I have no awareness of Jesus. I can pretend a reality and say, Jesus is my savior and stand there uttering words yet having no understanding of the meaning. Well, on this day after conversing with my wife, the words have meaning. My wife told me about a man that visited the store where she works. The man would always have a complaint. The complaints were never directed to her. He would complain about everything around him and constantly demonstrating his frustration of things around him. He cursed the round bag holder that could spin. "This thing is stupid because it can spin and let a customer forget their items they paid for and walk off with it here in the store on the other side of the bag carousel" he curses. My wife said she took pity on him as his suffering was easy to see. She offered him her services of ensuring he will have all his bags and wished him well. He changed for just a moment. The beauty is she brought that experience home and shared it with me. This experience shared with me while I had an open mind to try to understand her and be one with her as to allow the meaning to enter into me. I embraced the conversation and then I realized that he needed Jesus. He was in Hell and Jesus can help. The world attempts to help people by providing food, shelter and things needed to live and love and be well. It is a lack of understanding of these things which keep one in hell. This hell is in the person who is in it. It is locked away from the universe. There are separations of existence to create uniqueness and there is a heaven. The creation of heaven did not create hell, but from the lack of awareness of the heaven there is hell. The hell is not present when one is connected with the whole of earth and all that is in it. There is a feeling of oneness and euphoria. This is being removes the awareness of hell. One in hell needs to be saved. The mind cannot always save itself, so it God gave us Jesus so the mind has a thing which is not seen with the eyes to direct its soul out from hell. It is true. Jesus is the savior.
My day of suffering was not a day of suffering. It was meant to happen and from it I received enlightenment. The enlightenment that Jesus is a savior from those in Hell. Without him, many would be so deep in hell it will consume them. I now understand a new thing. If a person has a limp they get a crutch. If a person has no legs they use a wheel chair. If a person is in hell he needs Jesus. It is the only thing keeping people from being consumed completely. Those that do not are sinning and evil. It takes evil to see evil for the law of likes attract is true. A lesser evil is possible too. One can be burning less than another depending on how heavy their weight is. This is all normal. The weight can be lightened and the only way to lighten your load is to have a load. Some do not carry the load. If you believe in hell, you need Jesus. May Jesus save you.
Jami Stallings
August 21, 2009